DATING BEFORE? OR DATING NOW?

The word dating has relatively changed over generations. What we used to do before is not what we see now. Just when you thought that what you see on TV is what it is before, think again. And would you rather do it in a traditional way or the latest?

Of course dating in many countries is not the most common term, in areas of the UK we still see people using terms like “courting”, “going out with”, “stepping out with” or “seeing”. All terms have the same function, which is to describe a higher level of meeting with a person than just friendship.

Before, dating is relatively equal to courtship which leads to marriage which unfortunately is not the same motive as most daters today. Dating for the sake of it is becoming more widespread, almost like a sport, but the vast majority of people dating are dating for fun and at the same time dating with a more serious intent too.

We are a great deal more traditional about dating than we care to admit. It is till often the case that a man will ask the permission of the partner’s parent to marry their daughter. A very traditional gesture. In some, the man would need to visit the home, sing a song and/or do household chores to impress the future in laws. Some would bring gifts to the family of the person they are dating for approval. It is also worth making a note that in some traditions, dating is seen even by many of the young as interfering with the concept of family as dating is seen as threatening. With the influences of the West, of course dating is starting to invade every culture but do not think it is socially accepted everywhere. Do not forget either that in arranged marriage cultures, many men and women do have the chance to say ‘no’ to prospective partners, even thought the West often chooses not to accept that.

The purpose of dating is to meet someone we like on a personal level but dating can also mean casual sex too. But of course, there are plenty of people of both sexes for which dating is nothing more than physical contact. This can be due to age, attitude and outlook as well as desire. Its easy to take the moral high ground but people like to experiment sexually and like to find out just how compatible they are with someone else as much as about themselves physically before thinking about committing to someone. An to be honest why not. First sex on a wedding night is a romantic notion of decades past, but the idea that you could be married for life to a sexually incompatible person is terrifying to many.

The big bang started when online dating became a hit with almost everyone engaging in it. With the creation and development of a professional dating industry bloomed advisers and lifestyle experts to dating coaches and relationship counselors, to dating books and self-help videos to online advertisements, to paid sites and more. It has gone viral. Everyone liked it as it truly can save time and money. You never need to set a schedule and reserve a seat for a fancy restaurant, no bill to pay and lastly, no shameful escapes as you can always stop communicating when you think you don’t click. You will have the opportunity to like someone in minutes and get to know someone better without sacrificing finances and time in preparing yourself. Truly, it is never the same as meeting a person, dining in a restaurant and walking your date home. Of course, let’s not forget the first kiss (if, the female permits).

But of course not everyone likes it. Some are scared of scam and fraudulent profiles. Others would rather meet the person face to face to get the genuinity of the talk and seeing the real person other than talking to a stranger over the net. Some would rather test the sexual compatibility than just seeing sexy pictures of someone (who was never them in the first place) which then leads to heartbreaks and frustrations.

But then, lets face it. Whatever kind of dating we prefer, it is still undeniable that dating has given so much benefit in our society. Scientifically, it releases endorphins which gives us a good feeling of joy and satisfaction. It stimulates our brains and provides a good amount of adrenaline rush each time we talk to the person we have chosen to date. So whether it is online or in person, both can be of benefit and both can break our hearts. What truly matters is how we handle it.